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by Amelia G
- Slip MDMA in your date’s drink.
- Tell all your straight male friends you have come to terms with the fact that you are a lesbian. Men just don’t make it.
- Tell all your lesbian female friends and acquaintances you are 110% straight. Nope, a woman could never excite you.
- Tell your partner that you have been faking it all along because you only come with people who really love you.
- Tell your partner you’re a nice girl and you’ll only do that thing with the eggplant and the greased potbelly pig with someone who really loves you.
- Point a loaded gun at your date and mention that you’d really like to hear a declaration of undying love round about now.
- Dump your partner and hang out while they try to save the relationship by saying all the nice stuff they never said when it would have made a difference.
- Seduce someone totally inappropriate who knows damn well that only a towering passionate undying love could justify what they are doing with you.
- Get married. Really. There is no stronger aphrodisiac. This way either your partner will say mushy stuff to you on Valentines
Dayor all your commitment-shy
ex-partners will tell you that all along you were the one. You can’t lose when “I do” is what you choose!
- You could try declaring your undying love to your partner, however, this method rarely works.
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