Sun, sand, and seniors. Not senior citizens! What kind of pervert do you think I am? I mean high school seniors. Now, before you write me off as a demented sicko, hear me out. These young souls will often provide you with the perfect summer fling. They are oh so eager to test the limits of their parents and to dip their toes, and other body parts into the new found pool of freedom.

The best thing about this type of summer fling is that, in late August or early September, your 'other' typically goes away, off to college or wherever. So you say your onion-induced teary gooodbyes and skillfully reinforce them with "I'll miss you" or "Don't worry; I'll write".

Now remember, stay in the driver's seat. During your fling, meet them at the club or wherever. Never ever pick them up. Shotgun-toting Daddies typically don't go for freaky-looking guys picking up their little girls and Moms are always full of questions like: "So, are you attending school?" "What's your major?" and more and more and more. Unless you're like me and you look fifteen, you will end up with some pissed-off parents tracking you down.