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by Max Glick
Okay, you made it through Christmas and what have you got to show for it? An
empty bank account, a maxed out credit card, twenty pairs of socks and a
family and girlfriend who probably think you're cheap. Of course, you
had a $200 limit on your Visa and $100 in the bank from weeks of work.
Then, you lie in bed, thinking that your life is pathetic, trying to
find out how many socks can be attached to one human at one time.
Then your housemate walks into your room and finds you wearing six
pairs of socks on your feet, two on each hand, one on each ear, one
over your penis, one over your tongue, and two more pairs lying on
the floor. This is typically the time when your housemate offers
you a drink to rid you of your depression. You should not stumble
out of your house like this as you will dirty your nice new socks.
To prevent muss, switch the socks with some similar object, such as
party hats. You'll find that many others have also had this idea.
By the time you sober up, you'll just be sitting in your room
wondering where all these socks came from.
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